i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
What a dumb baby whore.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
