Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize