Christians are straight up FREAKS
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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