I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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