i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
