guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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