you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize