My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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