Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Randomize