I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
