And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
im holly from the hills drunk
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
