New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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