Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
