Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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