whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
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