you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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