his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Alive.
So much puke
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
