There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize