Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
