Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Less talking, more tequila
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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