He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Randomize