How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
