you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize