I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Randomize
