Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
