my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
