i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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