Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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