thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
