i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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