you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
