remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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