You really coming over, don't trick.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize