Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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