you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize