I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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