u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.