Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Someone shattered a urinal.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
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