I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
