Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
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