Texts From Last Night

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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  tonight, alcohol would be proud of us

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  (778): tonight, alcohol would be proud of us http://tfl.nu/7h3d
  Replies (10) Good night (5031) Bad night (634)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook

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  (716): I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook http://tfl.nu/bd4f
  Replies (8) Good night (3545) Bad night (703)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.

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  (352): i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so. http://tfl.nu/yfpa
  Replies (31) Good night (5025) Bad night (535)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.

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  (732): He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it. http://tfl.nu/hjdx
  Replies (79) Good night (9235) Bad night (2849)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit

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  (732): just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit http://tfl.nu/qpl1
  Replies (71) Good night (7929) Bad night (932)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit

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  (770): At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit http://tfl.nu/qd4t
  Replies (63) Good night (1165) Bad night (7517)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"

  (205): View more from Alabama

  pick me up NOW

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  (205): they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve" (205): pick me up NOW http://tfl.nu/weqr
  Replies (17) Good night (1226) Bad night (4737)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?

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  (770): We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date? http://tfl.nu/cigl
  Replies (16) Good night (3865) Bad night (1182)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...

  (1-479): View more from Arkansas

  I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma

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  (479): I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club... (1-479): I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma http://tfl.nu/vhqd
  Replies (23) Good night (978) Bad night (3502)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night

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  (952): Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night http://tfl.nu/i23x
  Replies (1) Good night (1993) Bad night (1068)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.

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  (604): I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag. http://tfl.nu/nwen
  Replies (28) Good night (3076) Bad night (644)
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  (607): View more from New York

  wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager

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  (607): wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager http://tfl.nu/0mj0
  Replies (3) Good night (927) Bad night (496)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god

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  (303): Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god http://tfl.nu/bdku
  Replies (13) Good night (1223) Bad night (444)
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  (786): View more from Florida

  I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.

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  (786): I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming. http://tfl.nu/qge1
  Replies (3) Good night (351) Bad night (565)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.

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  (913): For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room. (913): Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed. http://tfl.nu/pmqb
  Replies (0) Good night (446) Bad night (177)

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