It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Randomize
