it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
