thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
