So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
