You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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