You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
