I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
