TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Randomize
