can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
