i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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