How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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